Brian: [to Wellsley Shepherdson] Wow, you went to Harvard, huh? I'm an Ivy League man myself, I went to Brown.

Wellsley Shepherdson: Ooh, my incarcerated business partner's retarded gay niece went to Brown.

Stewie: (to Brian): I read your article too, Brian. Seems to me you should spend less time working on the paper and more time (in a high-pitched voice) working on that novel you've been working on. You know, the one...

(Peter shoots the ceiling and Chris falls through)

Chris: Hi, Dad!

Peter: Go to your room.

Chris: OK!

Lois: Oh, Brian, I can't believe they fired you! How come you never told us you dropped out of college?

Chris: I, I saw an after-school special about that! It didn't work out too well for Kristy McNichol, but, then again, nothing did.

Gary Coleman (as Stewie): Whatcha talkin' 'bout, vile woman?!

Peter: A-Team roll call. Face?

Quagmire: Here and handsome!

Peter: Murdoch?

Joe: Here, and... crazy!

Peter: B.A.?

Cleveland: I pity the fool! But also suggest ways he may better himself.

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