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Can't Touch Me

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Can't Touch Me
MC Hammer
From the episode: E. Peterbus Unum
Singers: Peter Griffin
Voices: Seth MacFarlane

"Can't Touch Me" is a song sung by Peter Griffin in "E. Peterbus Unum". It is a parody of the MC Hammer song "U Can't Touch This", first released on February 20, 1990 on the album Please Hammer, Don't Hurt 'Em. The original song is referred to during the song, claiming Hammer can't sue for copyright infringement.




(Peter has just stepped on the grass)

Police Officer: Hey, that's against the law! (Grabbing Peter's arm). You're coming with me.

Peter: (Peter pulls his hand out of the officer's grasp). Ah ah ah! Can't touch me! Can't touch me! Ju-ju-ju-ju-just like the bad guy from Lethal Weapon 2, I've got diplomatic immunity, so Hammer you can't sue.

Points to MC Hammer and then graffitis on a wall "Petoria 4-Ever"

Peter: I can write graffiti, even jaywalk in the street! I can riot, loot, not give a hoot, and touch your sister's teat! Can't touch me! Can't touch me!

Adam West: What in God's name is he doing?

Peter (dancing): Can't touch me!

Cleveland: I believe that's the worm.

Peter: STOP! Peter Time! I'm a big shot! There's no doubt! Light a fire then pee it out! Don't like it, kiss my rump! Just for a minute let's all do the bump.

Everybody does the bump

Peter: Can't touch me, Yeah, do the Peter Griffin bump! Can't touch me! I'm Presidential Peter! Interns think I'm hot! Don't care if you're handicapped! I'll still park in your spot! (Ties Joe to a back of the truck with chains) I've been around the world from Hartford to Back Bay! It's Peter, Go Peter, MC Peter, Yo Peter! Let's see Regis rap this way! Can't touch me!

The song ends. A police officer is writing a ticket.

Peter to woman: Except for you, you can touch me.

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