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I've Got a Little List

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I've Got a Little List
Stewie's Little List
None of them be missed...
From the episode: FG605 - Lois Kills Stewie
Singers: Stewie Griffin
Voices: Seth MacFarlane

I've Got a Little List is a song that was originally from the operetta The Mikado or The Town of Titipu by W.S. Gilbert and Arthur Sullivan. It was going to be sung by Stewie in "Lois Kills Stewie". Unfortunately, it was cut for time. This was going to be sung during Stewie's address to the world about the laws he put down. While the song wasn't included on the televised version of Lois Kills Stewie, it was included on the DVD cut on Volume Six.

Listen

The List

Lyrics

Stewie: Now, I have no doubt that perhaps there may exist some mild discontent amongst some of you about the recent changes I have implemented. Lest you be considering any sort of uprising, I should warn you I am quite prepared to make an example of any undesirable elements. And don't think I don't know who you are!

As someday it may happen that a victim must be found,
I've got a little list, I've got a little list
Of society offenders who might well be underground
And who never would be missed, who never would be missed.
There's the white kid with the baggy clothes who's talking like he's black,
The girl you date who doesn't get the jokes in Caddyshack,
The Asian guy who cuts in front of every single line,
And Britney Spears for accidentally showing her vagine,
And Bill O'Reilly's ineffective dermatologist.
They'd none of them be missed, they'd none of them be missed.
Secret Service Men: He's got them on the list,
He's got them on the list,
And they'd none of them be missed,
They'd none of them be missed.
Stewie: There's the guy behind the news reporter waving like a fool,
And Senator Bill Frist, I've got him on the list.
And the fat kid smiling warmly while he's peeing in the pool.
He never would be missed, he never would be missed.
There's the foul-smelling boy who comes to school in camouflage,
And every bleeding member of the cast of Entourage,
And while we're on the subject, HBO deserves a whack
For ending The Sopranos with a fucking cut to black!
And guys who when you shake their hand just bump you with their fist.
I don't think they'd be missed. I'm sure they'd not be missed.
Secret Service Men: He's got them on the list,
He's got them on the list,
And they'd none of them be missed,
They'd none of them be missed.
Stewie: There's the guy who sits beside you and keeps farting on the plane
And Shakira's lyricist. I've got him on the list.
And the smarty on Thanksgiving who says, "It's the trip-toe-fane!" (tryptophan)
He never would be missed, he never would be missed.
There's the blonde who tells you loudly with a voice just like a knife,
(falsetto) "You know, someone should do a sitcom based around my life!"
(normal voice) The guy who watched The Simpsons back in 1994
And won't admit the damn thing isn't funny anymore.
Stewie and Secret Service Men: And anyone
And everyone...
Who's ever...
Made me pissed!
Secret Service Men: Made me pissed!
Made me really really pissed!
Stewie: I've got them on the list.
They'd none of them be missed
Secret Service Men: They'd be none, they'd be...
They'd be none, they'd be none of them be missed.
Secret Service Men: He's got them on the list,
He's got them on the list,
And they'd none of them be missed...
Stewie: They'd none
Secret Service Men: None of them...
Of...
None of them...
Them...
None of them
Stewie & Secret Service Men: Be...
Missed!
Basso Profundo Secret Service Man: None of them be missed!

Notes

  • The Sopranos's finale would again be referenced at the end of the episode.

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