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Road to India/Quotes

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[Brian is talking about his broken to computer to Padma over the phone]
Padma: So, what seems to be the problem?
Brian: Well, one problem I have is that I have too much money.
Padma: Then why don't you just buy a new computer?
Brian: What? ... Uh, ... I ...
Padma: Oh, I am just bursting your balls.

Brian: People in love an overcome anything.
Stewie: I guess you're right. I mean look at Jeb Bush and his wife.
[Cutaway to Jeb Bush and his wife]
Jeb: Honey, do you think I'll ever become president?
[Screen pans out, revealing Consuela to be portraying the role of Columba]
Consuela: No ... no ... no.
[Back to Brian and Stewie]
Brian: [angry] Stewie!
Stewie: What? It's just a joke.
Brian: Yeah, but come on!
Stewie: Look it up, man. Google her!
Brian: [admittedly] I know what she looks like.

Stewie: I can't believe we're really in India. Oh, look over there. Those cute little kids are playing Cowboys and Indians and Indians.
[Three kids are seen pretending to be a cowboy, a Native American Indian, and an Indian]
Kid 1: I'm gonna shoot you with my six-gun.
Kid 2: I'm gonna shoot you with my bow and arrow.
Kid 3: I'm just going to stand here, wearing a shirt that appears to be a jacket.

[Brian and Padma meet in person for the first time]
Padma: Brian?
Brian: Padma!
Padma: Why are you here?
Brian: Because I was having technical difficulties with my heart.
Stewie: Ugh, 16 hours on a plane and that's what you came up with?

[Stewie makes a pun about New Delhi]
Stewie: Let's go get sandwiches at that "new deli" I keep hearing about.
[Ganesha performs a rimshot]
Stewie: Thanks, Ganesha.

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