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Road to Rhode Island/Quotes

< Road to Rhode Island

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Peter: Okay, Lois, I'll make you a deal. We'll watch the tape, but, gotta do somethin' for me.
Lois: Okay. What?
Peter: Do that Katharine Hepburn impression for me; a...and Philadelphia Story Hepburn, none of that 'head on a Slinky Golden Pond ' stuff.

[in the motel room at night]
Man 1: [offscreen] You got the stuff?
Man 2: [offscreen] Yeah I got it, where's the money, huh? I want to see the money!
Man 1: [offscreen] No, no, no, you don't see the money till I see the stuff!
Stewie: Oh for God's sake, there's only one way to put an end to this nuisance. [shouting] He’s wearing a wire!
Man 1: [offscreen] What?! you son of a…

[in the motel room; Brian licks Stewie's head as they are both asleep]
Stewie: [responding to a dream] Oh. That's it, Mr. Giraffe, get all the marmalade.
[the phone rings; Stewie walks over to the heat radiator and touches it, mistaking it for a phone]
Stewie: Hello? [burns his hand and releases] AGH! AGH! AGH! Oh, damn it to pus-spewing, blood-gutted Hell! Ogh..! [goes over to the ringing phone and picks it up] What!? What do you mean our credit card was declined? Oh-n-n-n-n-n-no, there's no need to come up. We'll...we'll...Oh blast! [trips] Dammit! [climbs onto bed and pulls Brian's collar] Oh..come on, you, get up. Come on! Go for a ride in the car? [trying to wake Brian, he pulls the duvet but slides under the bed] BLAST! Ooh, a penny.

Brian: Oh crap, we gotta disappear and quick. [a truck drives past and both vanish, but further right they're still on the pavement] Maybe we should've jumped on that truck.

Peter: Jeez, can we not talk about curtains for two seconds? I got another one of those relationship tapes. [Lois snatches tape]
Lois: $49.95? That's three times as much as the first one.
Peter: Lois, our relationship cannot be measured in nipples and dimes. I...I mean, nickels and boobs. [pause] Money. [runs off] I'll be upstairs.

Chris: Okay Meg, I'm thinking of another word; this time it's definitely not kitty. Can you guess what it is?
Meg: Is it kitty?
Chris: Aargh! Get out of my HEAD! GET OUTTA MY HEAD!

Brian: You could be in magazines. You could. And not just Juggs or Creamsicle.

Stewie: Oh, here's a pleasant sight; cirrhosis the wonder dog.

Stewie: Oh God, you're not coming out of the closet are you? Ugh, why does everyone always come out to me?

Brian: I'm not drunk, I have a speech impediment.

Previous Episode's Quotes /// Road to Rhode Island's Quotes \\\ Next Episode's Quotes

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