[Peter and Carter are having a boring time at the Griffin home]
Carter: Now what do you want to do?
Peter: Well, we could watch porn. Have you heard of porn? Is that something you're aware of?
Carter: [Excited] You have postcards from France?

Carter: Tear it all down, now! Or I'm canceling Kwanzaa.
Thug: What is "Kwanzaa"?
Carter: Ha! I knew it wasn't real.

Groom: Thanks, everyone! Goodbye, Mom! Goodbye, Dad! Goodbye, friends! Goodbye, free time! Farewell, sex! So long, golf on TV! I'll miss you, privacy! Goodbye, being honest about how many beers I've had! Nice knowing you, my own choices! See you later, money!

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