T.V. Medley
Family Guy - Live In Las Vegas
From the episode: Family Guy: Live in Vegas
Singers: Brian & Stewie Griffin
Voices: Seth MacFarlane

T.V. Medley is a song performed by Stewie and Brian Griffin. It was track 9 on Family Guy: Live in Vegas.

It is a medley of the theme songs from the television shows Diff'rent Strokes, Growing Pains ("As Long As We Got Each Other"), Charles in Charge, Silver Spoons, Who's the Boss?, Perfect Strangers, The Golden Girls and Family Ties.


Stewie: ♪Now the world don't move♪

♪To the beat of just one drum.♪
♪What might be right for you.
♪May not be right for some.♪

Brian: ♪A man is born,♪

♪He's a man of means.♪
♪Then along come two.♪
♪They've got nothing but their jeans.♪

Stewie: But Brian, ♪They've got Different Strokes♪

♪It takes Different Strokes♪
♪It takes Different Strokes to move the world.♪

Brian: That's true, but you know, Stewie,

♪Everybody's got a special kind of story♪

Stewie: ♪Everybody finds a way to shine.♪

Brian: ♪But no matter that you got not a lot.♪

Stewie: So what?

Brian: ♪They'll have theirs and you'll have yours and I'll have mine.♪

Brian and Stewie: ♪And together we'll be fine.♪

Stewie: ♪'Cause it takes Different Strokes to move the world.♪

Brian: Yes it does.

Stewie: ♪It takes Different Strokes to move the world.♪


Stewie: Hey, hey, why the frown, Brian?

Brian: Ah, I finished my drink.

Stewie: Oh, no.

Brian: Yeah it's empty, that always gets me depressed.

Stewie: Oh come on, Brian, why don't you

♪Show me that smile again♪

Brian: Oh, I don't know.

Stewie: ♪Don't waste another minute on your crying.♪

Brian: Mmm...

Stewie: ♪We're nowhere near the end.♪

Brian: That sucks.

Stewie: ♪The best is ready to begin.♪ Ooo-ooo-ooo-oooh!

Brian: ♪As long as we got each other♪

Stewie: Right you are.

Brian: ♪We got the world spinning right in our hands.♪

♪Baby you and me♪

Stewie: We've got to be...

Brian and Stewie: ♪The luckiest dreamers who never quit dreamin'.♪

♪As long as we keep on giving.♪

Stewie: We can take any crap that comes our way.

Brian: ♪Baby rain or shine♪

Stewie: ♪All the time♪

Brian and Stewie: ♪We got each other♪

♪Sharin' the laughter♪
♪And love.♪


Stewie: I say, Brian.

Brian: Huh?

Stewie: Who's that over there?

Brian: Where?

Stewie: There!

Brian: Why Stewie, that's

♪The new boy in the neighborhood♪
♪Lives downstairs and it's-♪

Stewie: I know it's understood. ♪He's there just to take good care of me♪

♪Like he's one of the family.♪

Brian: ♪Charles in Charge of our days and our nights.♪

Stewie: Yes indeed it's

♪Charles in Charge of our wrongs and our rights.♪

Brian: I have a feeling the wrongs are gonna cause more trouble than the rights.

Stewie: Look out, Sitcom Land - there's a new shipment of funny on its way!

Brian and Stewie: ♪And I say I want Charles in Charge of me.♪


Stewie: You know, I'm gonna take things down a notch here. Brian, do you remember when we did our first musical number from "Road to Rhode Island"?

Brian: I sure do. God, we were so young then.

Stewie: Yes, I mean not that we've aged all that much. I mean Jesus, I've been one year old for five years. And my point is this:

♪Here we are, face to face♪
♪A couple of Silver Spoons♪

Brian: ♪We're hoping to find♪

♪We're two of a kind♪
♪Makin' it go, making it grow together♪
♪We're gonna find our way.♪

Stewie: ♪You and I together♪

♪Taking the time each day.♪

Brian: You know Stewie, that's time well spent.

♪To learn all about those things you just can't buy.♪

Brian and Stewie: ♪Two Silver Spoons together.♪

Brian: ♪Together, we're gonna find our way.♪

♪Together, we're gonna find our way.♪

Brian and Stewie: ♪You and I together.♪


Stewie: Oh, you know, this is fun. I say we do a few more of these.

Brian: You say? Hey now, who's the boss around here?

Stewie: Who's the Boss, indeed.

Brian: Good segue.

♪There's a time for love and a time for living.♪
♪So take a chance and face the wind.♪

Stewie: ♪An open road and a road that's hidden.♪

♪A brand new life around the bend.♪

Brian: ♪There were times♪

Stewie: Oh yeah.

Brian: ♪I've lost a dream or two.♪

♪Found the trail♪

Stewie: Sing it, you fuck.

Brian: ♪And at the end was you.♪

♪There's a path you take and a path not taken.♪
♪The choice is up to you, my friend.♪
♪The nights are long♪

Stewie: Ah, ♪but you might awaken to a brand new life.♪

Brian: ♪Brand new life.♪

Brian and Stewie: ♪Brand new life around the bend.♪


Stewie: Gosh, you know, we sound so bloody good together.

Brian: Well, that's because we know each other so well.

Stewie: Oh, I suppose you're right. Good lord, just think how atrocious we'd sound if we were "Perfect Strangers."

Brian: ♪Sometimes the world looks perfect.♪

♪Nothing to rearrange.♪

Stewie: ♪Sometimes you just get a feeling♪

♪Like you need some kind of change♪

Brian: ♪No matter what the odds are this time,♪

♪Nothing's gonna stand in my way.♪

Stewie: ♪This flame in my heart and a long lost friend♪

Brian and Stewie: ♪Gives every dark street a light to the end♪

♪Standing tall♪

Brian: ♪On the wings of my dreams.♪

Brian and Stewie: ♪Rise and fall♪

Stewie: ♪On the wings on my dreams.♪

Brian: ♪Through rain and thunder and hail and haze♪

♪I'm bound for better days.♪

Stewie: Ahh.

Brian: ♪It's my life and my dream.♪

Stewie: ♪Nothing's gonna stop me now.♪


Stewie: I say, was I alright on that last note?

Brian: {Balki impersonation} Well of course you were, don't be ridiculous. {speaking normally} You know Stewie, I sometimes think about what it'll be like when we're old and gray.

Stewie: Hm, well for you that'll be in about five years.

Brian: Thank you for reminding me. But you know, even if my hair falls out or I lose my teeth or I'm in constant pain because colon blockage has made me unable to evacuate my bowels-

Stewie: I-I-I get it, I get it, go on.

Brian: Well when I'm in my golden years, I'll always look back on our association with fondness. I guess what I'm trying to say is

♪Thank you for being a friend.♪

Stewie: Don't mention it.

Brian: ♪Traveled down the road and back again.♪

♪Your heart is true, you're a pal and a confidante.♪

Stewie: Brian, I appreciate that.

♪And if you threw a party♪
♪And invited everyone you knew♪
♪You would see the biggest gift would be from me.♪
And if the box is ticking, it's probably just a clock.
♪And the card attached would say♪

Brian and Stewie: ♪Thank you for being a friend.♪


Stewie: You know why we're so close, Brian?

Brian: Why's that?

Stewie: Family Ties.

Brian: ♪I bet we've been together♪

♪For a million years.♪

Stewie: ♪And I bet we'll be together♪

♪For a million more.♪

Brian: ♪Ooh, it's like I started breathing♪

♪On the night we♪ uh, shook hands.

Stewie: Shook hands, right.

Brian and Stewie: ♪And I can't remember what I ever did before.♪

♪What would we do baby, without us?♪
♪What would we do baby, without us?♪

Brian: ♪And there ain't no nothing we can't love each other through.♪

Brian and Stewie: ♪What would we do baby, without us?♪



Man in audience: I love you, Stewie!

Stewie: Good.

Meg: Ew, Mom, look at Chris.

Lois: What is it, honey?

Meg: He's sweating like a pig!

Chris: Shut up, Meg, it's hot in here!

Lois: Meg, your brother's going through a very normal stage in the life of a teenage boy. His body's changing and sometimes it does some very strange things.

Chris: Mom, make it stop!

Lois: Chris, honey, there's nothing Mommy can do except smile and shake her head like the mommies in the Sunny Delight commercials.

Chris: Oh no, I'm screwed!