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The Top Ten Things I, Peter Griffin, Would Like to Say to America is a Late Show Top Ten List delivered by Peter Griffin on Late Show with David Letterman on February 23, 2006. His son Stewie would later deliver a Top Ten list in December 2009.
- 10. If George Bush had Dick Cheney's first name his name would be Dick Bush, and I'll tell you I'd listen to a lot more of his speeches.
- 9. Did the Patriot Act take care of Mujibur and Sirajul?
- 8. Shouldn't Crystal Bernard be in 'Playboy' by now?...I mean we did our part and sat through seven seasons of Wings.
- 7. Laura Bush killed a guy.
- 6. This is the best moment in television since Mr. Belvedere sat on his own nuts and fainted.
- 5. Did you know Jim Belushi had a brother who was in TV, too?
- 4. Hey Ben Affleck and Matt Damon, we're all still waiting on that second Oscar-winning script.
- 3. I have always wanted to do this...Ladies and Gentleman, The Max Weinberg Seven.
- 2. If Jay Leno makes you laugh, chances are I don't care for you as a person.
And the Number One Thing I, Peter Griffin, Would Like to Say to America:
- 1. We should all buy more American made products which at last check are down to porn and cheeseburgers.